| Thursday, April 28, 2005 |
| be a lucky lady tonight |
The past two weeks have been chock-full of events hosted by my company – brand launches, store launches, the works. Most of you have been invited but your loss for not showing up. There were freebies, festivities and buzz – both the bubbly and the beso-beso types.
lee, donna and me at the Zirh Launch April 21 @ Rockwell
And I have to appreciate being single because I have my pick among my gorgeous guy friends as to who can be my date to what. And I had two of the best of them. Without even a need for romantic involvement. Lucky me.
At the My Beauty Hub launch in 6750 last week I had Topsy around who a lot of the ladies and wished-they-were-ladies all fawned over. The whole evening they gave me the twinkling eye and the thumbs up for bringing such an adorable guy. It sucks that we didn’t get a picture together. We followed the evening with a late dinner at Yaku but I had already been plastered with about six glasses of sparkling champagne.
Then last week, at the Zirh launch in Rockwell I was with Hans. It helped that we had planned our wardrobe early on since it called for a Rat Pack theme (Attire: the real gentleman) and he was so willing and able. I didn’t tell many of my officemates that he was coming but to the few who knew, they were excited as hell. To quote one girl’s comment – he’s so yummy, I’m going to eat him all up! Haha hilarious. I think either this guy watched Hitch or he just has it entrenched as to what makes up good company for a girl. Not sticking too close at all times, but still keeping a visual. Being amiable at every introduction but not trying too hard. Actually take in and notice the event details to appreciate the work done. It also helps to have a sharp wit to fill up spaces with laughter and clever comments.
with hans and rod @ Zirh Launch
Topsy and Debbie (who had dibs on the date this time around) also followed. You can tell when the girls from my office feel comfortable or like one of my friends. Since they had met him the last function, they greeted topsy with so much warmth and welcome. This time around I was sloshed with a couple of huge glasses of Johnny Walker.
Well we don’t have any more events jotted on my calendar in the next week so I think I can breathe now. Even if it hasn’t been for my own brands, the tension is unavoidable. But like I already said, having had the perfect gentlemen as my dates made them so worth it. It’s such a wonder they’re still both single. Hurry girls get ‘em while they’re hot! Haha! Now I wonder who I should take to that wedding next month… |
posted by maldita @ 8:45 PM
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| Tuesday, April 26, 2005 |
| light head heavy heart |
i hate having this brain. the one that logically puts things into perspective. because now i know that that's that. i've been bouncing on this cloud then all of a sudden blam! clarity. who am i kidding? i can't bounce on clouds.
my entries have been getting shorter and my conversations with friends even more non-existent. I just don't have the strength to go into detail. i'll just throw myself into work.
bumped into gabby sometime last week and she begged me to write another article. I haven't even done the other one for andre yet. i'm so kalat. inside and out. maybe a weekend at the beach would do me good.
and thus i consult the sun and the stars: Think big, stick to your principles of love rather than getting carried away by something fleeting (and possibly misleading). The weekend inspires an overhaul of home and, perhaps, heart -- call it spring-cleaning.
times like these, i wish i had a musical instrument to play. i could express myself without words.
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| posted by maldita @ 7:25 AM
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| Saturday, April 23, 2005 |
| Fear is a funny thing. |
We think it’s what debilitates us but if you look closely, it makes us do things we don’t want to. Like run away and hide. Like mustering a smile when what you really feel like doing is hugging them. Like saying you’re ok even when you’re about to break down.
But as with all negative emotions, it has a limit. and once we've reached it - then comes the time to break the binds. to be is to do. to do is to be. but frank sinatra says do-be-do-be-doooo! |
| posted by maldita @ 9:51 AM
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| Thursday, April 21, 2005 |
| reality check. |
I don’t think anyone would appreciate being used. The whole notion pertains to summing up one’s significance with what they can give and not who they are. I mention this because that’s how I feel at this point. There are guys who just contact me when they’ve called their preferred company and got turned down. Or they want to expand their social circle through my network. Or they want to meet my girls who they can date thus feigning that they really want to be closer friends with me.
It isn’t that easy to detect at the onset, but in due time I’ve come to grasp what their intentions are and I have no fucking patience to put up with it. I think what bothers me most is that they pretend to be someone else. Look, if you guys just want a date with one of my friends or you need someone to watch your back on a certain night, then just damn say so. Don’t pretend you want some deeper friendship with me only to forget to call me as soon as you get what you want. Just lay those stupid cards on the table. I’ll still help anyway, but at least expectations are managed to a realistic level.
Lying comes in all forms. Bullshit in even more.And for some to think that I am stupid enough to continue believing them are sadly mistaken. Assholes and jerks are not limited to just people you date. I could be using my valuable time, advice and effort for those who deserve it more.
Picture this - you run to me when you need something and i help in whatever way i can because we are friends. but there are those who never call when they are having a good day and would like to share. Am i just a sponge for all the shit you have? Do i look like a friggin toilet?
I also remember a conversation with Debbie a long time ago about how girls usually neglect their friends when a new boy comes along. I accept it but I don’t tolerate it for obvious reasons. You can expect that these girls are the last on my list of priorities when a boy does enter my life. But there are those deserving individuals who are at a level above and beyond any potential partner of mine. This is carried over to the inadequate statement that “we’re just friends”. How can you rate friendship as less than a romantic tryst when it is supposed to be more resilient of the toll that time bereaves on any interaction? Maybe if you treat it that way then you have the wrong concept of what a friend is. And news flash, both genders are guilty of vilifying friendship but just with their own diverse approaches. |
| posted by maldita @ 9:17 PM
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| Tuesday, April 12, 2005 |
| a nice way of saying Fuck Off! haha! |
One more kiss could be the best thing
Or one more lie could be the worst
And all these thoughts are never resting
And you are not something I deserve
In my head there's only you now
This world falls on me
In this world there's real and make believe
And this seems real to me
And you love me but you don't know who I am
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand
And you love me but you don't know who I am
So let me go, let me go
I dream ahead to what I hope for
And I turn my back on loving you
How can this love be a good thing
And I know what I'm going through
In my head there's only you now
This world falls on me
In this world there's real and make believe
And this seems real to me
And you love me but you don't know who I am
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand
And you love me but you don't know who I am
So let me go, just let me go, let me go
And no matter how hard I try
I can't escape these things inside
I know, I know
But all the pieces fall apart
You will be the only one who knows, who knows
You love me but you don't know who I am
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand
And you love me but you don't know who I am
So let me go, just let me go
- "Let me go" by 3 Doors Down |
| posted by maldita @ 12:41 AM
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| Monday, April 11, 2005 |
| i DO love rock stars! |
i was just sifting through some of my friends' blogs and found out that marc had entitled my blog link "i love rock stars". true that! only last night, as i was chatting with my NFF (new found friend or no fuck friend? hahahaha!) i identified a coincidence. Last year was all about the filmmaker...well also the year before that. So for the past two years i had been either hanging out or dating filmmakers. But this year was all about the musician. It's a veritable cornucopia of rockstars, jazz fans and the occasional music enthusiast. It is just SUCH a trip when you see the bass player fondle the strings to create that rhythm and beat. Sometimes the guitarist has the same effect but not always.
I can't play for shit. I can't sing for hella more shit. But i adore the rocker. Even better if he sings or plays a song while staring into my eyes. that one is mine. |
| posted by maldita @ 6:55 PM
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| Friday, April 08, 2005 |
| babangon ako at dudurugin kita! |
| title got ya didn't it? i just watched this movie for the third time on cable. I love it! then again, i have a fascination with old Sharon Cuneta movies. But this one had Bembol Roco in it! oh gosh, here comes my starstruck story...I admired him ever since seeing "Maynila sa Kuko ng Liwanag". I attended the book launching of Prof. Morato about a year ago then lo and behold - he was a special guest! aaaargh! seeing this tall, thin, tan man - with of course, his bald head - was just too much for me to handle. i was so giddy! I finally couldn't stand it any longer and asked one of my professors to generate an introduction. He was the sweetest man! so easy to talk to and not an ounce of arrogance, he was kinda blushing actually when he heard i had wanted to meet him. awww. i wish i took a picture. |
| posted by maldita @ 3:08 AM
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| Thursday, April 07, 2005 |
| silver lining. |
All things considered...last weekend was pretty enlightening.
I don't want to focus on negative shit anymore because life is so much better when you look at it through a less-cynical, less-defensive perspective.
I decided to meet my apprehensions head on with only my straightforward honesty to arm myself with. And so i've had to suffer the consequences. But i prefer to do so with solitary confinement, that is, up until i meet up with the friends at capones for a nightcap before heading home after work. But i'm digressing.
So last weekend I found out who was really there when the chips are down. Breaking down in capones for possibly the umpteenth time, and venting in an alcohol-induced state - i got the best comfort any girl would want and need. Disbelief in current status, offers to take me home, dancing partners, compliments on my new look...and all from people i see on occasion. No one even needed to hear the story or know who the guy was. All they knew was that i had value.
Friends need not be a crutch. Sometimes I am guilty of that but a reminder of support is sometimes needed to prop you up from a ditch made of quicksand. For instance, i received my celfone bill today and realized i've ran to my best guy friend in New York in fits of depression. He's the only one who understands me without even trying. he's the one who believes in me even when i don't. And if anyone puts malice into that, i'll deck you.
Even sunday showed a certain guy's sweet sincerity. I had woken up feeling liberated and free from the previous night's gutsy confrontation. But as the afternoon wore on, i weakened. I was just about to sleep it off when i got a phone call. I got my hugs. I got to let go of a few more pent up tears. And i got a great new friend who up until last february did not exist. I almost got flowers too apparently, but its my own fault for not showing up as planned the night before.
It's not love that works in mysterious ways...It's life itself. You sacrifice so much of your own happiness to support others. Then out of nowhere, you find that you can depend on some (quality not quantity) people as well.
Even my new job has given me great personalities to encounter every single day. This whole war room of women is like a big fun dorm with lots of food and laughter. They've taken it upon themselves to make sure i eat right everyday, cover my ass when the need arises, know where to buy cheap clothes, and assess any guy before things go any further.
I may be sad now but AS ALWAYS, you get over it. Everyone always does. And who wouldn't, if you've got friends like these. Debbie. Topsy. Miggy. Jay. Red. Tony. Jose. Niki. Sadrina. Sarah. Sonny. JV. Carlos. Lee. Donna. Chris. Anna. Nadj. Aries. Pia. To name a few... |
| posted by maldita @ 5:08 AM
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| Monday, April 04, 2005 |
| I'm having a Garden State moment... |
i'm sure you've all experienced a period of time where your life mirrors scenes from a movie. Too bad if it's a film with a not-so-happy ending...but hold on - there could be some outtakes. if you wait long enough.
Andrew Largeman: Fuck, this hurts so much.
Sam: I know it hurts. But it's life, and it's real. And sometimes it fucking hurts, but it's life, and it's pretty much all we got.
Sam: You gotta hear this one song, it'll change your life I swear.
Sam: If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you like.
Andrew: We may not be as happy as you always dreamed we would be, but, for for the first time let's just allow ourselves to be whatever it is that we are.
Andrew: You changed my life. You changed my life, and I've known you four days. This is the start of something really big, but right now, I gotta go.
Andrew: You remember that idea I had about working stuff out on my own and then finding you once I figured stuff out?
Sam: The ellipsis?
Andrew: Yes, the ellipsis. It's dumb. It's dumb. It's an awful idea. I'm not gonna do it, okay? 'Cause like you said, this is it. This is life. And I'm in love with you, Samantha. I think that's the only thing I've ever been really sure of in my entire life.
Andrew: I don't want to waste another moment of my life without you in it.
and i've decided to let go of a lot of things...a lot of people...and my straight hair. |
| posted by maldita @ 6:56 AM
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| Sunday, April 03, 2005 |
| workshop alert! |
You're invited to the Shiseido Skincare and Makeup workshop.
A guide to proper skincare techniques and summer makeup looks.
April 8 5pm @ My Beauty Hub, 6750 Ayala
Tel. 7527909 and 7527933
April 16 2pm and 4pm @ Glorietta 4, Ayala Center
Tel. 7527307 to 08
April 23 2pm @ Powerplant Mall, Rockwell
Tel.8981606 and 8981615
Call now for reservations! or email me |
| posted by maldita @ 8:29 PM
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