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| Wednesday, January 18, 2006 |
| some things are better left unsaid. |
it's restless scene when you meet the new girlfriend of a guy you used to go out with. I swear you notice little beads of sweat on the guy's forehead wondering if you will slip because- by the way, he never mentioned that at some point in the past - you were more than friends. I also see the girls giving me a smile but the eyes have a suspicious inquiry of some sort. yeah man, that was a really long dinner! hahaha.
but I was very careful. There's a reason why i'm still friends with the guy and the last thing i want is to ruin his really great relationship. I expect that he has already told her all she needs to know but without any prep-time...it's hard to tell which pieces of info those are.
It's even worse knowing from other friends that she's a jealous one. So i try to put her mind at ease by asking her questions also. It easy to feel left out when your man's whole bunch of buddies are talking about stuff we did before she came along. And very often we all try to remember a certain movie we watched or who was with us at the time, i just give a very small hint or hardly finish my sentences just so i wouldn't have to say that we were on a date or whatever.
phew. to be friends with your past flames is like constantly walking on eggshells with their present girls but i suppose it's not meant to be easy. If it was, then we would be seeing it more often. At least i was blessed with the ability to completely forget or detach myself from an intimate relationship so as to work on the other that will last longer.
I always give full disclosure though when it comes to my own man. i think it would make him seem a bit ignorant or oblivious if he didn't. I want that when confronted by a guy that he had dated me, my man would just say - yeah i know. I think he would appear stronger that way...it would show that we have a very open relationship and that no man can get the better of him. but alas, that hasn't worked with past boyfriends whose insecurities resurface and then use the full disclosure clause as their own courtroom drama of jealous accusations. Ugh.
so for the next one: if you want to know then ask. if you don't want to know then don't ask. but don't blame me if you see a guy walking on eggshells in front of you over dinner. he's just trying to make sure he won't tell you something that you should have already known in the first place.
some things are better left unsaid by hall and oates |
posted by maldita @ 7:31 PM
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