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| Tuesday, October 21, 2003 |
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went to Capone's very soft opening last week. There were still construction guys around, no aircon, no flooring yet...but you could see that it was gonna be a good place to hang in the near future. the night was really good also...just a group of friends enough to fill the whole place up...enough drinks...the right mooooosic....whoopdeedoopdeedoop.
and yet i could only think of one person.
i just finished reading my assignment for creativity and intuition class tomorrow. My life could be a reflection of my movie suggestions. Remember "Someone Like You"? yes, the girls know what i'm talking about. Anyway, here's what my readings have to say:
There is this village in West Africa called the Balamah. Here they have four principles:
whoever comes is the right people. whatever happens is the only thing that could have. whenever it starts is the right time. when it's over, it's over. This is summed up by the Law of Two Feet. If at any point during the time together, anyone finds that they are neither contributing nor learning, they should use their two feet and move.
been talking to someone new lately. let's call him the deliberate bastard. everything with us has been planned and calculated. even until now i've been thinking, reflecting, deciding just how much of him i want in my life. slowly creeping up...as days pass. with every conversation, every text message, with every sweet line exchanged. i am still enjoying the deliberate bastard's capability to talk to me even during my most sentimental moments. i haven't let my guard down yet though. i think he still sees me as the carnivore, the man eater. he's only seen and heard about my vestiges. but not what was left with me. he gives me enough space to breathe but he also makes sure i know he thinks of me at least once a day...
last night i was in a very long debate and discussion with a friend about deliberate bastard. (in a very inebriated yet aware state of mind)
q: have you said anything to him or made him realize that you like him?
a: of course not.
q: do you want a boyfriend again?
a: i don't really need one right now. ruins the whole balance of things.
q: but what if he wants to be your boyfriend, would you consider?
a: yes...maybe.
q: but you said you don't want a boyfriend! now you changed your mind! which is it?
i was thinking about these questions the whole day today. the big difference i think is that...i don't really want to have a boyfriend now. my life is already unbe-fucking-lievably full of school and hanging with my friends. but why the hell do i get involved with these men? aaah i found the reason. I want to be in love :) |
posted by maldita @ 10:14 AM
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